Art of Living Stories.

People have this idea that being a Guru is a serious business. Nothing could be farther from the truth.
Presenting a hilarious sharing about Gurudev by Dvorah Adler:

 

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar lets a group of us waiting outside into his room. It’s late at night and I’m stoked because I don’t have far to go because my room is right next to his!! (Remember?)

I walk in and sit on the floor facing Gurudev. My feet are pointing directly at him. John who’s sitting next to me, tells me to move my feet away from Guruji’s direction or at least cover them. I try, but it’s very uncomfortable. I’m thinking (Geez! Give me a break! Not another traditional old wives tale).

And I remember Gurudev once saying: “Did I say that?? Did I tell you to do that?” So now I’m feeling more at ease with the whole “feet” situation.

Nevertheless, I’m still trying to move my feet, not wanting to seem disrespectful. Gurudev sees me fidgeting and offers a solution: “Dvorah, come sit over here”.  He motions to the bench to his right where my friend Jeff is sitting. I move over there and get comfy. My back’s been screwed up for long time and sometimes I lose my usual “sexy walk” and kinda “hobble” around. I actually bought one of those Native Indian walking sticks and call it my Danda stick.

I’m sitting happily looking at Gurudev, minding my own business when he calls me out: “Look! There’s Mikey over there!” He wrote “Stumbling into Infinity. Dvorah is Limping into Infinity” The place starts laughing, they sense the fun is about to begin!

“That’s going to be my new book Guruji. Limping into Infinity. Mikey and I are going on tour together. When they call us up to talk about our best sellers, we’ll stumble and Limp onto the podium! hahaha

 

Dvorah_Datetree

Well by this time the iPhone cameras are rolling and we’re on the floor laughing and I can’t stop. The mental image of me and Mikey hobbling together up to the podium is just too much. I look over at Mikey and as usual he wants to hide to get away from me.

“C’mon Mikey, let’s show him how it’s done!” You stumble and I’ll limp and mumble and we’ll just fall into Infinity!” By now no one can keep a straight face, the place is Rolling! On The Floor!

“OH Guruji” I say. “You’re the best! “(the crowd ooooohhhhs) “You’re THE BEST IN THE WEST!!” I slide down to the floor leaning against his sofa.  The crowd is now laughing and cheering with glee! “You are just too too much Gurudev” I beam happily. “You’re just too too much!” “Well Dvorah” He laughs, “I’m surprised you JUST realized that after 25 years!” The crowd in the room in now howling. I’m looking at Guruji transfixed, completely smitten beyond repair. (How the heck does he remember it’s been exactly 25 years?)

“Gurudev do you remember telling me how I look great, at least 20 years younger then my age? Well guess what?? That was NOT a compliment! Gurudev! You think that was a compliment, but it wasn’t!!” I look at the crowd getting ready for my punchline………… when Guruji steps in:

“Yes! She was old even then!” He begins to laugh, beating me to my own joke!! “When she was a kid” He continues, “She looked like a grandma!!’ hahaha  Even I couldn’t help laughing so hard, I was choking.

“Guruji,” I tease, (making a peace sign for the cameras), “It’s tough having a guru that’s funnier then you! “Nobody can compete with you, De-vo-rah!” He laughs. “I give up!” I chuckle. (Now, I’m thinking I gotta get up, before my legs fall off!)

“Guruji, I can’t get up, seriously” I complain. “My legs have fallen asleep. Can’t you call a truck or something to pull me up???” “Oh Dvorah” He turns to the crowd. “Does anyone have any bananas?” The crowd begins to giggle.

Guruji pats his legs, several times and bobbs up and down in laughter: “If you sit next to Dvorah and you want some silence, make sure you have a bunch of bananas.” He dissolves in laughter patting me on the shoulder and handing me a date; motioning me to put it in my mouth.

“I don’t think that’s funny, Guruji!! Does anyone think that’s funny!” I say with a straight face. We all howl with laughter.

“Guruji” I look up at him, “Are you going to call a crane to get me up? How am I going to get up?” “Are there any donkey’s here?” He jokes. “If somebody has to get up, the best thing to do is get a donkey. They come and they drag you up!” He’s jousting with me now patting me on the shoulder. We’re a comedy routine! and I’m in a bliss!! I’m loving being tapped on the shoulder by my Guru. And I JUST LOVE BEING a STRAIGHT MAN.

“Is that donkey stuff true Guruji?”, I innocently ask. “Yaaaahhhh” he affirms. “In ancient times there were no cranes, everything was done by donkey.” We are all in hysterics again imagining me being dragged and hoisted up on a donkey and dragged out the door! I’m in stitches trying to keep a straight face!!

“OYYYYYY” I moan, trying to get up again. “Guruji, can’t you just help me lose weight?” “My God!!” He retorts, eyes wide open. “That’s a huge task! It would be easier to ask me to join two continents together!!” The place is now in hysterics, breaking out in rhythmic clapping. Guruji hands motion two continents coming together. It’s all absurdly amusing!

I pull myself up to my knees, pointing at him with my index finger, as if to say: ’You got me!!!’ Gurudev still laughing, offers a “high five” and I tap his right hand several times.

I look at the crowd and ask with a straight face: “Is that funny?” “What’s funny” chides Guruji, “Is that you can still talk with a date in your mouth!”  The place roars. “That date has a pit in it.” He jokes. “You better be careful a tree is going to sprout!” I keep my straight face, as the crowd in the room can’t control themselves anymore loses it, cheering, laughing, clapping and God knows what else!! Again! I clearly see I’ve lost this ‘battle’, and begin to get up. “Oh well” I think. “Maybe next time”.

As I get up, someone in the crowd chirps up: “Dvorah, we want you to stay here, it’s so funny!” “I know honey!”, I respond, pulling myself upright. “It’s because when I go, you all go!!!” hahahaha (Unfortunately we all know that’s true!!!)

We are ALL now giggling and happy to be together. I finally get up as Sri Sri begins to hand out prasad and bless individually all HIS silly smiling unruly devotees(including me). WE just LOVE having fun and hanging out late at night with our Adorable Lovable, Naturally Funny, Mystical, Magical Guru. I’m mean really?? What could be better?? hahaha

 

Also Read : http://artoflivingsblog.com/guru-nature/

Also Read : http://artoflivingsblog.com/unspeakable-tragedy-assuaged-healed/

More about Dvorahji Dvorah Adler :

Facebook : https://www.facebook.com/dvorahji

Website : http://www.shutupguru.com/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/dvorahji

Comments

comments

3 Responses to “LIMPING INTO INFINITY”

  1. Alka Tejsingh

    Thanks to all this stumbling and limping, we are now laughing into infinity 😀

    Reply

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